Sometimes when you can’t lean on anyone else….you find yourself. This has been a rough three weeks for me. I have had more drama and stress than I can handle…but I am getting through it. Working is definitely helping out….when your body is physical pain you can’t cry anymore about other things. I have some backup plans now and I will figure it out. I have an amazing family and I know we will pull through.
There are things that I am doing in bootcamp that I thought I would never be able to do. I thought that I would sit out on the alligator crawls. But no I was right there in the thick of things. Tonight I was able to do most of the things on the tires. We have amazing coaches…and the guest ones we had tonight were an added bonus. Because of this bootcamp…I am size smaller than two months ago…PROGRESS.
Many of us are stress eaters…we eat when we are stressed. I am definitely one. The last three weeks have been ridiculously bad weeks for me. Because I wear my emotions on my face, I have avoiding people like the plague. I have not gained any weight but I am not losing either. Both professionally and personally, I have way too much drama this year. I am ready for a do-over. 2013 you can start over at anytime. There is only so much that someone can take. I know that I should be happy that my family is healthy and safe but I have let so many things eat me alive that I know it is not helping with my weight loss. I know why I am not losing but I can’t help it. I have been so much that and it hurts when I eat so much but I can’t stop. I have cried enough tears this week…I am ready to move on. Soon the craziness will be resolved…I hope. Special thanks to those of you have listened to me and let my cry on your shoulder…especially the ones miles away.
Please like 4Vida’s Bootcamp official page….http://www.facebook.com/pages/4-Vida-Dance-Fit-by-Mario/445218225532053?fref=ts
Well, my week 2 is done. Both bootcamp and graduate school started at the same time and it is interesting tracking them together. This past week was also my birthday week and I was also sick. It was interesting week, started out a little crazy but ended up on a high note once my family arrived. I have some amazing friends who helped me turn 31 as well.
I have to skip tomorrow’s workout because my family is in town. But I will definitely get some cardio in with a lot shopping. Yesterday’s bootcamp was crazy. I did not think that I could do a modified “alligator” crawl. I tried it at Christy and Mario’s persuasion and it was not as bad I thought it would be. Sometimes you need a break and I need some family time. Today we spent some shopping after my doctor’s appointment and had a great diner. Tomorrow we celebrate my brother’s birthday and I am super excited.
Nutritionally I have a few areas that I am going to start working on…starting Monday. I am a stress eater. I took my quiz tonight and as usual I waited until the last minute. As I was taking it, I ate a cracker. After the quiz, which I did not do so well on…I got a 23/25 (I like perfect scores), I ate a small handful of cereal. I need to learn not to turn to food for comfort…it is a hard process but I will soon get there. I also need to work on taking m vitamins regularly. I took them as I was losing hair but now that I am not losing hair, I have been very lax on taking them. I need to work on taking them throughout the day.
15 months of school left and 6 weeks of bootcamp left…as my mom said…you do anything for a limited time…as long as you put your mind and heart in it. When push comes to shove…you will get it done.
Last night I experienced something incredibly awful. I had my first dry heaves and mini throw up. I had drunk water too fast and it came back up. I am still figuring out what how much I can have and how much my body can handle. It was the most awful feeling in the world. Who would have thought water would cause so much damage. I am still going to have make sure that I get enough water in so that I don’t get dehydrated but now I am leery of drinking so fast.
Day 3 of bootcamp was a success. I did zumba before and because I did not feel well it was hard to focus. I need to focus on me and not get distracted. I get distracted so easily. I think that all engineers have ADD and that is what is makes us awesome at our jobs. We are used to multi-tasking and get bored easily.
I was given an assignment this week. A personal assignment. I need to learn to accept compliments and figure out to block out the negative comments. I tend to focus on the bad versus good. When someone compliments me…I don’t know how to take it…next someone compliments me, I need to embrace and I am working on that.
Grad School is going well…just a lot of reading and homework. We lost a teammate…he decided to pursue a different opportunity. I wish him well but it means more work for me. I am trying to stay on top of it. Sometimes I feel like I can’t do it all. I work, go to school, do bootcamp, tutor at a children’s shelter, doctor appointments, and try to have a social life. It is a lot for one person. Sometimes I feel like I am just going through the motions and I live in my car. I could not even imagine if I had a child during this process.
Less than 24 hours till my specail day and I am super excited to see my family….let’s go team 4vida!!!
What an awesome weekend. Saturday was amazing..I finished the week of bootcamp and the first week of school. I also went to Austin to celebrate my birthday with my two of my girls. I love sister time and we made some amazing sister date plans…I am excited for this year.
Bootcamp is hard…whoever thinks that this process is easy…is out their mind. I hate it during it but I am proud of myself and the others for completing it and coming back for the next day. We got this. 7 more weeks to go and we have a lot of progress to make. I hope that we can enjoy little victories and keep cheering each other on. We have the best coaches and its going well so far…..
I turn 31 on Thursday and I am super excited. My family is coming into town and we are going to celebrate my birthday and my brother’s birthday. We are five years and 2 days apart. I am so grateful he is in my life and he is one of best friends. I love family time and can’t wait until Thursday. So 31 years ago on the day I was born…the 49ers won their first superbowl. Now they are in the super bowl again and I am super excited. What an awesome birthday present that would be!!! And Michael Crabtree, who is a star on the 49ers, is from my dad’s school Texas Tech…I got to see his game winning catch in person against the longhorns 4 years ago…Let’s go 49ers!!!
The start of another week, is chance to do better and with my birthday this week…I am excited for everything that is going to happen this week.
Day 1….you gotta TRY TRY TRY
I survived day 1 and I did way better than I thought I would do. I have an awesome partner..Sue Rocks!!! Now I am just trying to figure out how I can climb up the stairs. It is going to be a hard crawl up those suckers tonight.
I gave it 110%. I attempted everything. I was dripping in sweat within the first ten minutes. I need to wear my watch to see how many calories I burn in one sitting. I need to make sure that I know how much I burn so that I know how many calories to take in during bootcamp days. There were some things that I could not do but I did modified versions. Thanks to the great coaches: Mario, Ali, and Christy who helped us through a rough first day workout. Now I know I how the contestants on the biggest loser feel. Hopefully I will continue to progress and get better each day. Vitamins you will be my friend tonight.
I am still not tracking my calories like I should. I think it is because I am trying new foods and I don’t know how to track them. I am still figuring out this nutrition thing but I have amazing nutritionist who is making sure that I get enough calories in. Who would have thought that my biggest problem would be not getting enough calories in during the day? Not this girl. I need to make sure that I get enough protein in my system. I am trying hard not to use protein shakes as my source of protein. Using protein shakes is a good way to get protein in but you have to get the majority of your protein through real food. This will allow your body to process and digest food properly.
Are there things that I am scared of during this bootcamp. Hell yes. I am scared that one day I am going to be lazy and not go. I am scared that I not going to progress. I have to make sure that I have enough calories in my system to support this bootcamp. I have to worry about hurting some existing injuries. I have to worry about falling and balance…let’s face it…grace is not my strong suit. There is a lot that could go wrong but as long as I keep my eye on the prize…I will be ok…no I will be better than ok…I will be GREAT!!!
In six days, I turn 31. I am going to Austin to spend some time with my Texas angels and have a few cocktails. I am super excited to let lose. My hope is that this year will be better than the last and that I will continue to grow stronger and better. I hope that I make the people who matter most to me proud of whom I am becoming.
Day Zero……….here we go!!!!!!!!!!
Here we are at day zero. The last three months have built up to this day. Damn sandbags. I have a feeling that I will hate those little things more than. I guess the saying….what does not kill you will make you stronger…holds true for this program. This is a hard, crazy, and intense program.
I am starting to track my calories more because I need to make sure that I get enough. I need to eat at least 1400 calories a day. Which seems like a lot to me, but I don’t want to have any issues during the bootcamp. I will be eating a lot of quest bars. They don’t always taste the best but they have carbs, fiber, and tons of protein which should provide with enough energy to get through this. I will be posting my weekly calorie and calorie goal in the next post.
My Grad School started yesterday as well. I am not sure how both the bootcamp and classes are going to complement each other. I am going to have to work extra hard and may have to miss some things in order to get everything done.
Sometimes it is hard for me realize what I have accomplished. I still see someone who is 90 pounds heavier. I lost 90 pounds…that is teenager. I have changed who I am and what I stand for. I have changed what I am willing to accept from others. Things that would have made me upset in the past don’t bother me anymore.
My goal is not quit the bootcamp (or school). I may miss out on a few days because of my birthday but my goal is to finish the next 8 weeks …and finish strong. I may not be able to do everything that is asked of me but I will at least try. I know my body and my limitations. I will have to work past those limitations and try to be better. I can only be better than what I was yesterday……
“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure”
I have had so many dreams go by because I was scared. I had a lot of fear. I am learning to let go out of that fear. I have an amazing support system which will pull me up when I don’t think I can do it. This weekend I conquered the first step of improving my career. This upcoming week, I will take another step in my lifestyle change. Both are scary events…but I got this!!
This was a good week. I am officially an ASU Sun Devil. In May 2014, I will have my masters in information management from Arizona State University. I was so nervous about going to orientation. I hid my room for 20 minutes because I was nervous. I did not want to go down there. The people in this program are much smarter than I am and I don’t know how I am going to measure up. So I went downstairs and it was fine. I even made some amazing friends.
My next conquest is bootcamp. I am super nervous. But I was super nervous for the orientation and I survived things. I need to get over my fear of something new. I think that I talk myself out of things that are hard. When things are hard I run. I don’t want to be a bootcamp dropout. I am scared and full of fear. I hope that I will be able to do most things but if I can’t do it all, at least I will give it my all.
The thing I have to remember…is that I am capable of anything. I just have to get mind and heart to understand that I can do anything that I put my mind to and it will make me stronger. Will I succeed at everything…no. But I as long as I give it 100%, I will have a good chance of conquering most things.
It is almost two weeks away from my birthday. I will be 31 and now is not the time to have any fear. Now is the time not be scared of anything or anyone. Life will bring its own set of challenges and I have to be there to meet them. The strength I derive from my family will allow me to conquer anything…..